In my mind and heart I will be running to get on the plane back to France. The only regret is that I must once again leave my family behind. Of course, we will talk on the phone. Angel will visit. Perhaps after time my mother and father will come. My brother has already promised to make a trip to France. He told me that he didn’t want to wait until 10 years had passed for him to see my children again.
I’m happy that my children have gotten to know my family better. They love their grandparents and uncle. If nothing else came out of our attempt to move back to the States, it was still worth it because of this.
I will always remember:
My father walking into the room and Boy Blue smiling brightly as he says, “Hi!” My father responds back, “Hi, boy!” Sweet Bear snuggled up beside my father just like I used to do. My dad teasing Petite Clown because she looks like a boy thanks to Sweet Bear’s attempt at being a hairstylist. Petite Clown would scream at my Dad, “You a girl!” and then she would die of laughter.
My mother sitting with the girls wrapped warm and snug around her in a chair. Or, my mother teaching them songs and Boy Blue dancing with his head bobbing up and down. My mother teasing them and getting them all excited as they ran like wild children all around the house. My mother giving them bubble baths as she did my brother and I when we were kids.
My brother laughing as he picks on each one of my children just as he did me when we were children. He is the ultimate annoying brother and even more annoying uncle. My kids love it and him very much.
My mother’s arms tight around me as she sobbs telling me that she would do anything for me to stay. She understands I am happiest in France. However, it is hard for her to have her child (me) so far away from her. Even if we have our problems, we love each other.
My father’s face was sad as he told me that he sure hated to see us go. Dad doesn’t show alot of emotions. He hides them inside. But, I know he will miss watching his grandchildren grow up near to him in America.
My step mother understands that I am most at home in France. Even if she was born and raised in Canada she always loved America. She feels like America is her home.
I will miss my family.
I wish I could pack them up and take them with me. Really, I do.